Life Experiences Define One's Identity

         In the book, “The Overachievers,” journalist turned author, Alexandra Robbins tells a story about what it’s like for many young adults in the high school world today. Throughout the book, she goes on to explain how high school can often times no longer be a place for the standard learning environment and the exploration of daily education, but that it becomes a “competitive frenzy” that gives students “intense pressures to succeed” and “paralyzing fears of failure.” These feelings are sometimes planted in the minds of these individuals by other students around them that are striving to be the best and the smartest. However, more often than not it’s the parents of these students that, with or without knowing, pressure their children into becoming the overachievers that many become which can define ones identity (250).

         Like Alexandra Robbins says, high school has become a “competitive frenzy” and not-so-much about the daily curriculum of learning and exploring about the topics and things that the student likes or dislikes, or trying to find out what type of vocational skills he or she is interested in learning more about to better fit their chosen career path. It has become so much more in the recent years with the ongoing social influences students are surrounded with from early ages in addition to the extreme amount of pressure many parents unknowingly place upon their child or children (250, 251). “Students (and parents) begin to pile on advanced placement studies, activity after activity, and acclaim after acclaim,” this is all done with one simple goal in mind: College Admissions (Robbins 250). They are striving for a beefy high school resume. Parents often don’t realize the amount of stress this can put upon these kids because it is outweighed by the mere fact of them believing their student is succeeding and being the best at everything they take on – while this is manageable for a lot of teenagers, this can be too much to handle for some and can often result in rebellion or complete loss of interest in learning all together. Although, with the proper drive and motivation, it can also lead to the life of driven, career minded young adults that will succeed and become the overachievers they were bred to be. In “Who You Callin’ a Bitch,” author Queen Latifah wrote, “My mother believed in me before I even believed in myself.” This is a choice example of how the parents can often be the driver behind the wheel of their children.

        Everyone has heard of peer pressure and in today’s world it runs rampant in every school, in every state, in every city, not only nationwide, but worldwide. It’s amazing to think how certain adolescent experiences can be so life changing. That one friend the child may meet could ultimately change the person’s life forever in either a positive or negative way. Drugs are one example of how a student’s life can be affected negatively by meeting or running with the wrong crowd; and while he or she may be ultimately making the decision themselves to take the drugs; it is likely this new friend or individual that introduced them to substances once unknown to them in the first place. This is a very common situation of adolescent experiences and peer pressure that can define ones identity in a negative way. It fits well with the saying, “wrong place at the wrong time.”

          It’s amazing how much positivity can come out of peer pressure as well, when more often than not, one would associate negative behaviors when associated with the term “peer pressure.” The peers that one is surrounding themselves with are also capable of positively peer pressuring one into productive and healthy activities and experiences. As an example, if they are hanging around with a group of friends who enjoy playing sports, then he or she is far more likely to join a team or play as well. This same situation can be applied to most any positive activity or special interest. Those you associate yourself with are often responsible for ones ultimate career decisions. These are all positive influences or pressures that can define ones identity as well.

           It is clear that a person’s life can be defined by an outside source through adolescent experiences or social pressure; including those exuded by friends or family members. It is important that though these influences may be positive, it is known that negative pressures exist as well, and that it is wise for each individual to make sure that they themselves define who they are and not somebody else.

Works Cited

Robbins, Alexandra. Quotes from “The Overachievers: The Secret Life of Drive Kids.” 

     Copyright @ 2006 by Alexandra Robbins. Published by Hyperion Publishing Company.

All right reserved.

Queen Latifah.  “Who You Callin’ a Bitch?” Remix. Catherine G. Latterell. Second Edition